"That's why I don't want to get married...

... because I'm afraid of getting infected!"



WHAT?

This broke my heart.

I made a friend in Africa... in fact, quite a few, but one in particular.

I got choked up on the bus one day after leaving one of the villages and he noticed.

Upon returning to the house he asked me what had gotten me so upset. I started out the day just fine... my normal self, but by the time we left for home, I just gazed out the window and cried to myself. He noticed... and so we sat in the yard and talked about all that we had seen that day. We talked about how easy it is to love the people and how hard it is to leave them. We talked about AIDS. We talked about how a whole generation was lost to this one disease.

A whole generation!

We came across so many grandparents and so many grandchildren, but no parents. They were gone. Lost. To AIDS.

We talked about one little girl in particular who a lady on our trip became very close with. The girl's mom left after she was born and her father died of AIDS... which meant there was speculation that maybe this child had this disease too.

AIDS is taboo. Some people rather not know than get tested. I take that back... most people. I won't speak for all of Africa, or even all of Uganda, but I will say that a majority of the people we came across all agreed that most people would rather not know. If they don't know, they don't have it... or at least that is where they put their hope. With the testing comes confirmation, and if the confirmation is positive, all hope is lost. Some people would rather risk their life than risk their hope, because to them, their hope is their life. If they have no hope to live... what's the point?

To a certain degree I think everyone can relate to this. We all have hope in something whether we know it or not.

The question is... where are we going to put it? And how are we going to let it dictate our lives?

Are we going to let fear of losing that hope paralyze us from taking the next step, no matter how hard that may be?

I know there is a really good spiritual answer to as this... "put your hope in Jesus," but with all do respect (while totally agreeing that this is what is necessary), people need to be helped physically before you can help them spiritually. People need to know you care. People need to be loved. You can tell someone Jesus loves them all day long, but if you aren't showing them love, what good is that? And why should they believe you?

I discovered a common bond between my recovery from an eating disorder and my trip to Africa... a need for physical health.

When Jesus healed, he healed people's physical needs and then He ministered to their hearts.



So what does this have to do with getting married?

This was my friend's response when we talked about how prevalent and how scary AIDS is...

"That's why I don't want to get married... I'm afraid of getting infected."

My heart broke. Here I go around saying I don't want to get married because "guys are jerks," or "Mr. Right doesn't exist," and my friend, my friend who has a desire to spend the rest of his life with someone, lives in fear of that very desire.

Infidelity rates have been extremely high in Uganda (but getting better), which is why even those who get married aren't guaranteed safety from this disease.

In talking with another team member from Uganda, he told me that (statistically) every single person in his country either has a family member or knows someone who has died from AIDS... every single person.

A whole generation... lost!

Gone.

And while even though there are those who live in freedom from this disease, they still live in fear of the "what if?"

"What if I get infected?"



And so... I pray for my friend. I pray for his desire and I pray for his fear. And though I will never be able to fully understand his fear, I understand his desire. And so I pray for him.

As best as I know how, I pray for all of them.