"I've always liked the time before dawn because there's no one around to remind me who I'm supposed to be, so it's easier to remember who I am."

-Brian Andreas

Saturday, September 6, 2008

the results

My dermatologist is amazing.

You wouldn't think so if you met him, or if you went to his office, or even if you saw my skin right now, but my dermatologist is amazing.

1st... You can't understand a word he says... he's oriental in some form, but I don't really want to guess what nationality because I'm sure I would end up offending him or someone of that nationality for assuming they all look the same.

In my opinion, they do, but I don't want to offend anybody.

2nd... If you step into his office it's like experiencing a time warp. You're sent directly back to the nineteen seventies... I think, I wasn't alive yet... but there is absolutely no sign of technological advancement anywhere in the near future. They still use a type writer... honest to God.

I even think they have the first spinning desk chair ever invented. It's large and wooden, covered in red "leather" fabric (except for the arms and legs) and it's so bulky that you have to push pretty hard to get it to spin... I saw him attempt to spin a few times... it didn't work. Not to mention the creeks when he leans back in it don't exactly scream "up to date."

3rd... I left my meds at home while in Africa for 5 weeks... and boy, did he let me have it. I practised being tough while I was sitting on the table waiting for him to come in because I knew he was going to be angry, and believe me he is not afraid of showing it... but you can't ever really prepare for an encounter with him.

He has no bed side manner what so ever. In fact, he's actually kind of scary. This man is like 5 feet tall and probably 60 years old... but good Lord is he intimidating. Intimidating... but genius. Which is the only reason I continue to see him.

He does absolutely nothing for my self esteem... he's not afraid of blurting out, "oh.. dat wook horrible."

Yes.. thank you, Dr. Chua, I know that, that's why I'm here.

I was watching him today while he was writing out my prescriptions and I noticed his lab coat even had a big rip in the side. He opened his pea green cabinets to see if he could find me some samples and he attempted to explain in english the directions that lay ahead of me for the next 3 months.

I didn't understand a word he said.

But I nodded.

At the end he always asks if I have any questions, and I've learned to never say yes because he yells at you for asking them... apparently because he has already said what it is you're asking, you just couldn't understand him.

Never say yes. Just say OK and thank Walgreens for giving you directions with your prescriptions. I owe them many a thank you cards.

So... why am I writing about him?

I don't know.

To be honest, most people think him rude and stop seeing him because he doesn't tell them what they want to hear.

I think that's why I do see him. I want the truth. I don't want the sugar coating. Sure, he doesn't exactly make me feel good while I'm sitting in his office, but he gives me hope because he's honest. "Dis is bad, but we fix it. It take time, but we fix it."

I sometimes wonder if that's what God is saying to me when I'm going through a hard time... "Dis is bad, but we fix it. It take time, but we fix it."

I bet He even says it in that accent.

What I like about my dermatologist is that even though he's out of date, he knows his stuff. He's not flashy, he just is. He doesn't spend his time or money on re-doing his office or getting fancy gizmos and exotic art pieces for the wall. He spends his time and money on his patients and what they need.

So even though you may get the vibe that he doesn't care, I think he does.

Sometimes I get the vibe that God doesn't care, especially when things aren't going good and I just want Him to fix them... but I think He does.

It just take time...

to see the results.

2 comments:

Shelley said...

People who just tell you what you want to hear don't do a very good job at getting you better.
People who only tell the truth but do it without compassion can hurt you deeply.
How do we ever find the balance?

love ya JJ, keep writing, it is awesome.

Anonymous said...

I am so proud of you for going to Dr. Chau - and for writing about it in the way you do - not only for your experience but the impact of the 'truth telling' being as therapeutic as the medicine. The Truth is what really heals not the sugar coating - thanks, JJ, for being a woman who seeks Truth.
Love,
Marmie