five girls

I told God to come and get me tonight.

I don't even know if I knew what all that entailed, but I got an attitude with Him after hearing another one of my sister's (not blood related) talk about how broken hearted she was, and I told Him to come and get me.

"Come and get us all!" I said.

"We are your daughters! What are you doing? When are you going to put your foot down? When are you going to stand up for us and protect us? I know you love us, so if it us that are making these bad choices about who we allow into our lives, then shame on us, but please, God, please give us the wisdom to know better and the strength to stand up for who you made us to be. You guard our hearts! We are weak, Lord, we are weak! We'll settle for comfort and for less than if you don't come and fill this void that you've promised to fill... that only you are capable of filling, Lord. So come, fill me, Lord, fill us. Come and get me! Come and get us all!"

One by one I named my girlfriends, along with myself, and asked God to pursue us.



I want to be pursued. I am a girl... and I am human. The human desire to be loved mixed with the female desire to be loved is a mighty powerful combination... not just to receive love, but to give it. I love hard. And I will love someone real well one day... this I do not doubt.

But my questions arise when I wonder if anyone will ever be capable of loving me in that same way.

And even though I am not at a place in my life where I am "ready" to share that love with someone, the desire to be pursued, to be loved, doesn't go away.

I think this is why so many people settle. They'd rather live with less than in the now than wait without until the later. People want that desire to be met, so they find someone to meet it.

But that's just it... I don't want to find someone to meet my need to be loved. I don't want to find anybody.

I want God to meet my need to be loved and I want Him to show me who He desires to share my heart with.

Does He even desire to share my heart?

This is something I've wondered a lot over the years.

And whether it be based on my own past experiences, or the stories of others, I sometimes wonder if I even want God to share my heart with someone else.

Ultimately I do, but the fear of a broken heart paralyses me.



Five girls. There are five girls I have talked with this week who have been broken hearted by some form of a relationship with the opposite sex. Some left with no explanation, some with too much of an explanation in the form of hurtful words and name calling.

My heart breaks for these girls.

This is not an anti-male post... not at all. Nor was the one I posted when I "said it," as some people asked. I was hurt by him, but he was hurt too, at some point in his life, I'm sure.

This is a post about brokenness. About my own and that of others. About my flesh that wants to place all the blame on the ones who have hurt me, but my spirit that says we are all weak. We are all damaged... in some way, shape, or form. We all have our own stuff, and it is going to affect who we are and even how we interact with others. And while some might be OK with our stuff, others will not. And when it's the others who aren't, that's when it's hard. You can't make someone be OK with your stuff no more than you can make someone else's stuff be OK.

I say all this because I realize that those who are hurting are the same ones who have caused hurt at some point. No one is exempt. We've all been hurt, we've all caused hurt.

These girls, these women are hurting, and God knows I am praying for them.

And He knows that I am not exactly at a point in my life where I want to defend the male population, but that is proof that the Holy Spirit lives in me, because my heart breaks for them too.

These women have been hurt by men, who have been hurt by women, who have been hurt by men, who have been hurt by women, who have been hurt by men, and so on, and so on, and so on.

We're all broken. We're all hurt.

And so I end my prayer with this...

"God... we are your daughters and your sons. Come and get us all!"