humor heals

I've been having a hard time lately... with wanting to write and all...

I once again find myself in a place where there is so much I want to write about, but don't know if I can... or if I do... how much can I share? I don't know.

Lately I've been sad. Mostly because it seems like I've lost a good friend. To be honest, I don't know how long you have to be friends with someone in order to consider them a "good" friend, and if it's more than 2 weeks, then maybe he doesn't fit in that category, but you know how there are some people you just click with and right away and they become your good friend?

He was one of those.

There was a click. I heard it. I felt it. I knew. I knew he was my friend. Maybe because he was weird... like me... I don't know, I just know there was a click.

Those clicks are so weird aren't they? They come when you least expect it. They come when you're doing just fine and you don't need anymore friends, or certainly anymore clicks, and they just sneak up on ya and... click... they seem right. When something clicks, it always seems right. Even when the timing is off, we think when it clicks, it must be right.

But...

I don't know what happened.

He doesn't really talk to me anymore. And I don't know why. I've had a hard time with it and I've really wanted clarity about it...

Until...

I went to work one day and it all became so clear.

It was a normal day at Starbucks... I was on my break, along with a shift supervisor and we were hanging out in the cafe with two girls who were off of work. One of the girls made a comment that she needed to shave her legs so bad, but I guaranteed her that her legs weren't as bad as mine. She insisted "no way, no way... mine are horrible. You have no idea." She showed them to me and I just laughed... she had no idea! I suggested we have a contest to see who had the longest leg hair, and even include one of the guy baristas as part of it. She thought I was joking, but little did she know (nor did you, I'm sure) that I have not shaved my legs the whole entire winter. In fact, longer. The last time I shaved was in September.

Hah... if you're not grossed out yet, keep reading...

So, I warned everyone before I revealed them, but the warning didn't minimize the shock value. Haha. The girls leaned back in their chairs, covered their mouths with their hands and all you could hear was "OH MY G...." They didn't even finish the sentences. Their eyes got as big as quarters, and we all just laughed. One girl started taking pictures and said if she were to look at me from the the knees down she would think I was a boy. I'd said it was a tie between the guy and I, but even he said I had him beat.

Everyone was trying to understand why I hadn't shaved, as if I wasn't allowed to. Haha. I just said it kept me warm in the winter, and there's really no point... no one else is getting in bed with me, so I might as well stay warm. "It's like having on an extra pair of long johns," I said. I've come to love those things. Not to mention, it saves a lot of shower time.

Honestly, it all started as a joke... not shaving, but when I realized it's shock value, I just figured, "what the heck... it makes for a good laugh..."

Anyway... all that to say... Erin, the shift supervisor, asked if my guy friend who I had been interested in (the one I clicked with), if he had seen my legs. I laughed and said no, but he knew, cause I told him. "But, Oh wait" I said, "he probably did cause there's a video of me showing them to the camera on facebook." She asked if he was still talking to me and I said no. She, who at one point was so encouraging to me, laughed and said... "well, if he saw those things... he has my permission NOT to talk to you."

And that's when it hit me... guys don't like girls with hairy legs.

I still didn't shave right away cause I started to like the way the leg hair felt when it was blowin' in the wind... I now know what Bob Dylan was talking about... but eventually, I caved. We had one really good warm day and I realized I better start shaving if I want to pull out the shorts. So... I started last Thursday... and I finished by Saturday. 7 months of no shaving and all it took was 2 razors and 3 days... that's a bargain! I'm amazed at how good it feels to have my legs back. I couldn't see em' there for a while, but now that everything is back to normal, life is good.

My friend still doesn't talk to me... he's dropped a "how are you?"or two on facebook, but has yet to respond when I ask how is him. It makes me sad. But I'm OK... because having hairy legs for 7 months makes you appreciate the small things, like a nice clean shave... even when you are sad.

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(in all seriousness... hairy legs and shaving and yada yada really have nothing to do with the situation... I think :)... but sometimes you just have to use humor to heal from your pain.)