again today

Feburary 5th, 2007.

Only two days prior to that date the Chicago Bears were in the Superbowl. I'm sure lots of people, especially Chicagoans, remember that day, but I don't. I remember two days later... Feburary 5th, 2007.

The day before the Superbowl I arrived in Chicago for the first time on what seemed to be the coldest weekend recorded in Chicago history. I was arriving from South Carolina. I never realized how warm 58 degrees was (the temperature the day I left home) until I arrived in Chicago... The coldest day I had ever experienced up to that point.

I remember the plane ride... the pilot would come over the intercom and say "DA BEARS!!!" and everyone on the plane, except myself, would yell back "DAAAAAA BEARS!" I was impressed by the team spirit, but I myself was in no mood to cheer.

I wasn't going to Chicago to see the bears play in the Superbowl that weekend. Nope.

That Superbowl weekend, 2007, at 23 years old, I was heading to Chicago (as the few of you who read my blog know) to admit myself into a treatment center.

3 years ago, TODAY, I walked through the doors of a very unfamiliar place, knowing that my life was about to drastically change... should I survive the winter.

I don't want to go into detail, and I don't want to write a lot about it (read old entries), but 3 years ago, TODAY, my life drastically changed because my recovery began.





And even though 3 years have past, I'm still recovering, as I think I will be... until I reach perfection.

And I know I will, just not yet.

Honestly, there are some days more than others that I long for that day when I stand before my Father in Heaven as He holds my face, heals my wounds, and tells me how much He loves me.

It's one thing to know someone loves you. It's a completely different thing to hear them say they love you. I can't wait to hear His voice. To audibly hear the man I have given my life to say "I have always loved you."

3 years ago, TODAY, a man I gave up on continued to love me.

3 years later, TODAY, I have fallen in love with Him... again and again, and again.



I know that sounds cheesy to some, but since being in recovery, I am OK with cheese.

I have good days and bad (as I'm sure most of us do but don't necessarily vocalize) but the bad days make me grateful for the good ones. And today... today was a good one.

February 5th, 2007... 3 years to the day.

The journey has been long...

and it has been hard...

but it has been worth it.




To those of you who are hurting, please hear me say as honestly as I know how... the journey is long, and it is hard, sometimes so hard... but it is so incredibly worth it!

And so are you.